


You're my hill to die on

by DynamiteMars



Category: Dungeons & Dragons (Roleplaying Game), Dungeons & Dragons - All Media Types, Just Roll With It (Podcast)
Genre: Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-05
Updated: 2021-01-02
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:20:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,211
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25094497
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DynamiteMars/pseuds/DynamiteMars
Summary: After being tricked into a blind date with each other Br'aad and Taxi agree to have a three month long pretend relationship that ends with the most dramatic breakup known to man.But they both know how fake dating is doomed to end so as an added challenge, whoever falls in love first loses.You know exactly where this is going.
Relationships: Taxi/Br'aad Vengolor
Comments: 17
Kudos: 95





	1. Seal the deal

**Author's Note:**

> I've just been writing the first chapters to things and then not finishing it oops, hopefully I can get this one done

“Br’aad this isn’t happening.” Taxi’s tone was hard set, bordering on annoyance.

“No no no, you gotta hear me out on this one Saxi. Listen it would work perfectly and it would be so funny.” Br’aad sat backwards in one of the many chairs in the cafe, arms outward as if gesturing wildly would get the other on board with his plot. 

“You’ve had a lot of bad ideas in the time I have known you, but this is truly your worst.” He pinched the crinkled bridge of his nose 

“This is the best idea i’ve ever had and by the end of it they’ll never bother us about dating each other again.” 

What he was referencing was the pestering of their friends that they would make a good couple. It started off as a few offhand comments, asking what one thought of the other & gently teasing their friendly dynamic to be that of an old married couple. Then it spiralled into this, a blind date that both had been coerced into. 

At this point it was just annoying. 

They had seen eachother in the cafe and stopped to say hello, promising to break away when they found their respective dates. Then they both realized the set of identifying clothing they wore: for Br’aad a deep purple scarf & for Taxi a striped green hoodie, matched the description of their aforementioned dates. That's when Br’aad first started pitching his plot. 

It was quite honestly simple on paper. For three months they would pretend to be absolutely head over heels for each other. There would be no stops pulled and the goal was to be obnoxious as possible. When the time limit ran out they would act out the most dramatic breakup known to man and their friends would never stick their noses into either of their dating lives again. 

But if he accepted it wouldn’t just be on paper, it would be messy and complicated and very, very much not on paper. He could always appreciate the talent of acting but this seemed like several steps too far. And well… he’d read a fake dating fanfic before, he knew how these situations were doomed to end. While it wouldn’t exactly be a terrible thing to fall for someone in that lense, admittingly Taxi didn’t want it to be Br’aad he fell for. 

“Have you ever read a fake dating AU?” He said the words through gritted teeth. 

“I’m too pretty to read fanfic” Br’aad pushed his hair away from his face letting Taxi roll his eyes at the comment, “But I know exactly what you’re referencing, and it won’t happen.” 

“How would you know what i’m talking about unless you’ve read that fanfic trope before?” 

“Because I- …Shut up that's why.” He pointed at Taxi menacingly. Or at least as menacingly a blond twink could. Taxi held back a laugh. “But! You are not my type, and there’s literally no way you could fall for me.” 

“Famous last words.” His voice was warning but, he saw the sense in Br’aads statement, he was admittingly pretty but everything between them would clash romantically. 

“I’m not hearing anymore protests...” He sang, eyes flashing with a familiar teasing amusement. 

“You still haven't said anything to convince me.” Taxi raised an eyebrow leaning back in his own chair. 

“I’ve already said that it would be cool and funny! What more do you want from me?” Taxi leaned his head back to stare at the ceiling. For whatever reason the plan was sounding more like a good idea, which most likely meant he was going insane. 

“Three months isn’t a very long time and this will be the play of our lives. If we pull this off they’ll finally stop weirdly pressuring us. Imagine the opportunities you will lose by turning this down!” He closed his eyes and took a breath. The pestering _was_ getting annoying and if their friends were willing to trick them once, they’d likely do it again. 

“Fine, let's do this.” With an exhale, Taxi held out a hand to shake. Br’aad looked at it amazed. 

“Wait really? I figured you were about to tell me to fuck off.” His smile shifted into one more nervous. 

“Just shake my hand before I change my mind.” He sighed, hand still steadily out. Br’aads eyes flitted up from his hand to meet Taxis. His demeanor changed into that of a smirk within the blink of an eye. 

“I think I have a better idea to ‘seal the deal’. Just roll with it alright?” He leaned forward placing one hand on the side of Taxi’s face pulling him closer. 

“Wha- What are you doing?” He put a hand in front of Br’aads face to stop him from getting closer. 

“I figured that it would be more appropriate to kiss instead of shake your hand.” He dropped his hand away. 

“...I’m not going to kiss you.” 

“Taxi, Taxi, listen to me, I get that and I feel the same way but, I don’t want the first runthrough to be the performance. We agreed there would be no holding back so we’re gonna have to practice unfortunately.” Br’aad gritted his teeth and grimaced. 

“You say unfortunately like this isn’t just your master plan to make out with me.” Taxi teased. 

“Literally shut up, if I wanted to make out with you, we’d have done it already.” Br’aad crossed his arms and gave him a smug look. 

“Strong words coming from someone who just signed up to have a fake boyfriend just to fuck with his friends.” He shrugged. “Are you calling me easy?” 

“Even stronger words coming from the fake boyfriend! And yes, you were the one who was worried about us falling in love within the span of three months, I'd say that's pretty easy.” 

“It’s a reasonable concern!” 

“Maybe it's a concern for you, since you are apparently going to fall in love with me, _I_ don’t need to worry about it.” 

“You don’t need to worry about it? If anyone is at risk of falling in love it’s you. Remember that person you fell for, what was his name? Cedric right?” 

“That’s a low blow, what about Velrisa, you simp?” 

“I’ve never been in love with Velrisa!” 

“I’m still counting her.” 

“What? No, she doesn’t count, but Cedric definitely is a point against you.” Br’aad glared then suddenly his eyes lit up with an idea. 

“The drow!” He pointed at Taxi as if making an accusation, the one word turning him into an embarrassed mess. “There we go, now we’re even.” 

“I was drunk!” He buries his face into his hands thoroughly flustered. 

“Still counts.” Br’aads voice trills. They may be even in ‘points’ but he’s won. He makes Taxi suffer in silence a moment before talking again. “Since we’re both so convinced that the other is going to fall in love, how about we make this prank even more interesting?” He leans closer again, head resting on the crook of his elbow. 

“I’m listening…” Taxi lifted his head, desperate to move on to any other topic. 

“Whoever falls in love first loses, and since it definitely won’t be mutual-” 

“Of course.” Taxi agrees, the fact that in every fake dating fact swearing not to fall in love seals their fate occupies the back of his mind. But, this is real life right? It’s not a thing that would happen here, especially with them... 

“The other can make fun of them over it forever.” 

“So i’m taking a bet I already know i’m going to win? You have a deal Br’aad.” 

“We’ll see who’s so confident in three months.” Taxi can see the competition rise in the other’s eyes. Maybe it's the closeness or maybe just the adrenaline of accepting something he knows is going to leave him anxious but he feels confidence rise in his own. 

“It’s going to be me, but shall we ‘seal the deal’?” 

“I don’t like it when you say it, it sounds like a sex thing now, but yeah sure.” Taxi whirls back suddenly very self conscious of where he is. 

“I-I didn’t mean it like that!” His hands are resigned to gripping the sides of the table. 

“Calm down Saxi I know, just come here.” He laces another hand onto Taxi’s cheek and pulls him closer. 

Br’aad finally closes the distance. He used his hand, lightly sitting against the underside of his chin to tilt Taxis head to the side. His lips were warm pressed against his own. Taxi closed his eyes and felt himself lean closer into them, feeling Br’aad smile in between themselves. Then he moved away crossing his arms over his backwards chair 

“You’re a bad kisser.” His grin was shit eating and he dropped the gentle hands as soon as they separated. “Let’s scam these fuckers.” 

Taxi suddenly realized that the next three months were going to feel like just about an eternity.


	2. Hallway

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little shorter than I'd like but, I want to cut up my chapters into something a little more manageable so I don't leave too many days between updates

The door to Sylnan’s and Br’aads shared apartment was daunting. A light shade of brown bordering on cream that was covered in scuffs and marks. It was dinghy but under any other circumstances Taxi would have been happy to be there. 

But no, Here he was, mere hours after his new agreement with his old friend and new ‘boyfriend’, Br’aad. His heart rate pricked quickly in his chest and felt his palms sweat. He never particularly had a taste for lying and the long three months laying ahead did not do too much to dissuade that. 

He didn’t even know exactly what they’d be lying about. The relationship mainly but, Br’aad had stubbornly refused to help in creating any sort of story or cohesive plan. He insisted that they just wing it, let the spirit of improv take over. Taxi never had been very good at improv. 

The door just sat there in front of his expectant eyes, like it could swing open at any moment. He swallowed his nerves and glanced over at Br’aad, his eyes were closed and he breathed loudly as if his breathing exercises that he insisted on doing were just another joke. Maybe they were, Taxi half the time couldn’t actually tell when he was joking half the time. 

“Are you going to insist on doing that every time before we're going to be around our friends?” At the sound of Taxi’s question Br’aad opened one eye, mouth curling into a grin. “I just don’t think you’ll really have the chance to get into character for twenty odd minutes before every conversation.” Taxis eyes crinkled through the words, his eyes flitting back to stare tepidly at the door. 

“I mostly just wanted to see how long you’d let me stand there.” 

“Br’aad!” Taxi glared down at the other, who just leaned onto the frame of the aforementioned door, as if to signal that he had plans to continue delaying when they’d enter. “I’m nervous enough as is without you messing with me.” 

“There's nothing to be worried about Saxi!” His hand waved around flippantly, dismissing his concerns. “You just got to go with the flow, and when in doubt, leave it up to me to create some bullshit.” 

“This is going to be a disaster if we don’t have some kind of script…” Taxi groaned. 

“If you see the opportunity to do something or say something cutesy then do it, that's it. That will be your job. I’ll wear the pants and do the talking then.” Br’aad placed a hand on his chest gesturing toward himself. 

“I can't do that!” 

“Taxi you got to work with me here, I can’t do it all.” 

“Then let me make at least some kind of script.” His voice was hushed and bickering. 

“It’s too late for that now, we’re already here.” Br’aad shrugged idly, not caring to be as quiet as the other. 

“And whose fault is that? You have to work with me as well. I knew this was a shitty idea.” 

“You’re giving up already?” It was a mixture of disappointment and exasperation 

Taxi’s hands drew toward his face hiding his own annoyance. Turning on his heels and pacing across the narrow hall, desperate to calm prickling and stubborn nerves. He didn’t want to give up on this project so soon. Br’aads outward personality just never dialed down long enough for him to really see past the obnoxious mask, and he essentially signed up to have it taunt every one of dreams and days. 

A deal's a deal though. He agreed to it and it would be… wasteful to let that binding kiss fall on empty promises. And well, it would be a little rude to break up with someone mere hours into the relationship. He agreed to try, and try he would. He let out a sigh and let his shoulders slump. 

“No, I agreed to this, it’s happening.” He ran his fingers through his fur pointedly ignoring the smile of excitement Br’aad returned. “I’m just,” His eyes met with Br’aad’s.”...Nervous.” 

“You're always nervous though.” 

“Because you’re always doing something that makes me anxious Br’aad.” 

“Oh.” He stared at the floor, somewhat resigned and quiet, his smile fading. 

“Sorry, I didn’t mean that.” He did. 

There was a beat of silence in the hall. It seemed almost laughable that they had sworn to mock an unavoidable love only hours prior. The buzz of air conditioning and bustle from accompanying and equally bruised doors crackled in the air like a strange sort of tension. 

Then voices and steps filtered into earshot, one gruff and another soft spoken, both familiar. Murmurs of conversation drifted from the stairwell leaving them both with wide eyes staring at each other. 

“It’s showtime Taxi.” 

“Oh gods, this is happening isn’t it?” He felt nauseous. 

“Yep! Do something romantic, we have to start off strong!” He was really too excited for this. 

“I- Okay.” He surged forward and took Br’aads hand into his own. “This is gonna suck.” He laced Br’aads arms around his neck, leaning down and leaving their faces on equal ground. 

“Okay so i’ll kiss you and when they get close enough to recognize us we can act surprised.” Their noses were nearly touching, it was truly closer than he ever wanted to be. 

“You’re in charge.” Br'aads face drifted into a smug look. “See it’s not that hard! You just gotta take the opportunities-” Taxi cut him off with a roll of his eyes and shut him up just as the top of his friends' heads drifted into view from the stairwell.


	3. Rings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a hot second!! My boyfriend has gotten me hooked on that sweet, sweet, cottage core life that is Stardew Valley and I can't ever and don't want to go back. I'd be lying if I said this large time gap between chapters won't happen again,,, so anyway enjoy!!

Taxi let his hands rest carefully on Br’aad’s waist, anxious and mindful. Palms distinctly sweaty he tried to focus down the hall instead of in front of him. The faintest snippets of words drifted down toward him and each of his friend's footsteps rang out like a ticking clock. To what he wasn’t exactly sure, but the bomb had already been planted.

It seemed they had paid very little attention to them yet. Perhaps engrossed in a conversation or simply just disinterested in the faraway figures. Br’aad’s head twisted, reeling Taxi’s attention back, however unfortunate that may be, and Taxi became a little too distracted to figure it out. 

The words of the man with a face pressed to his own resonated through his skull and urged him to escalate. Every thought of his own was in the many stages of grief and horribly uncomfortable. Hanging out with Br’aad was a bit like inviting a parasite into your head, you lost many brain cells, leaving you both on the same wavelength and his own thoughts became privy to the other. 

That must have been where the courage came from. His hands felt a bit more solid as one guided their bodies toward the wall and the other fell away from Br’aad’s waist to pin the admittedly grimey wallpaper next to him. Br’aad hit it with a gentle thud. He hummed a note of approval at the action. 

Or maybe the courage just came from the lack of air he was getting, that was definitely a possibility too. Br’aad pulled away with a sudden noise of surprise, shocking Taxi into opening his eyes. Br’aad had pulled a mask of alarm pointedly glancing over his shoulder down the hall and then back to Taxi’s eyes. 

“What’s wrong…” He racked his mind for some kind of pet name. “...Darling?” He held back a wince at both how forced the words sounded and in expectation of what was about to happen. 

“Taxi.” Br’aads head snapped to face him and gestured back toward the place he’d been standing. 

“Hm?” He cocked his head to the side trying to pretend as if his attention was purely on his partner. Br’aad's eyes narrowed and he manually turned Taxi’s head to the side. 

It wasn’t that hard to act flustered, the emotion wasn’t too far from the one he was actually experiencing which just so happened to be deep seated embarrassment. The faces of his friends stared back at him, averaging out into just fucking confusion. Most of that coming from Velrisa, if anything Mountain looked like he was about to start laughing. Taxi couldn’t tell if he’d fallen pale or if he’d gone completely red in the face. 

“Is it movie night already?” Br’aads voice was high, face marked by a nervous smile and strained eyes. 

“Y-yes…?” Velrisa clearly didn’t know what to make about the situation in front of her. 

“Oh” His eyes met with Taxi’s and he let out a breathy laugh. “Whoops?” There was a beat of silence in the hall. 

“We’re just gonna, um” Velrisa stared at the door to the apartment, everything in her voice suggesting that she would like to escape through it. “G-go inside.” 

She pulled Mountain with her by the back of his shirt. He didn’t seem to have the strength to resist the dragging, too busied with his rapidly devolving composure. She hurried into the unlocked door, shutting it behind her just as fast. 

In retrospect Sylnan probably shouldn’t be leaving his door completely unlocked in the brothers rather crime heavy neighborhood. However having a locked door around Br’aad, and especially one that he would have to get into, was never the safest idea either. He found great joy in kicking them down. The door was also as thin as paper as evidenced by the explosion of noise erupting from Mountain that could be heard behind it the moment it shut, which probably just made it that much more satisfying. 

“Okay so that wasn’t bad for the first performance, I feel like we didn’t make them uncomfortable enough though.” Br’aad pushed out of Taxi’s arms and paced across the narrow hall. 

“I was uncomfortable plenty, that was definitely a better performance than ‘not bad’” Taxi dragged his hands down his face, turning to lean against the wall with a thump. 

“I don’t think we really hit the obnoxious level yet, we can work up to it though.” 

“I think you’ve hit the obnoxious level already.” Br’aad pointedly ignored the jab, instead focusing on wiping at his mouth. 

“I literally have fur in my mouth, this fucking sucks.” 

“You knew I had fur when you proposed this plan, maybe you should have thought about that before you decided to make out with me outside your brother's apartment.” 

“I just said do something romantic, you were the one who decided to push me against a wall and make out with me.” Br’aad whipped at his face again. “Please tell me I’m at least not going to be coughing up hairballs by the end of this.” 

“Why are you eating the fur on my face? You’re really over exaggerating this.” Taxi rolled his eyes. 

“I’m not eating your fur dummy, it just gets in my mouth naturally.” Br’aad threw his hands up in frustration, clearly the whipping not effective enough, then his head cocked in curiosity. “Do you get hairballs?” 

“I’m not an actual cat Br’aad.” His mouth snarled into a disgust at the thought. 

“That’s not a yes or a no…” He shrugged 

“Of course I don’t!” 

“Whatever you say Taxi…” His voice trailed off and he gave a few winks just to embellish that he definitely didn’t believe him. 

Taxi closed his eyes and let out a deep breath, praying to the gods that they could give him enough strength not to strangle either himself of Br’aad. “I’m going inside.” He pushed off the wall he leant on and turned to the door 

Seeing this Br’aad leapt out of his pacing from farther down the hall and rushed the door, trying to almost get in first, unfazed by the others tone or at least not showing it. 

They walked in, Br’aad pushing himself through first, only narrowly missing stepping on Taxi’s feet in the process, to see their friends in varying states. Velrisa wore a weary face, nursing a glass of water with the perfect amount of ice cubes. Mountain looked practically gleeful, most likely at the fact that a spiteful looking Sylnan was handing him a twenty in his outstretched arm. They all turned as the pair walked in. 

“Br’aad i’m very happy for you both, but if you could have waited like one more day, I would have won twenty dollars” Sylnan stepped forward to put a supportive hand on his brothers shoulder, who in turn gave him back a smile. 

“You guys were betting on when we would get together?” Taxi attempted to give them all a glare, but every single one refused eye contact. “Velrisa, even you?” She kept her eyes pointedly on her water glass and shrugged sheepishly. 

“I mean I figured it was harmless, it was seeming a bit inevitable this would happen at some point.” Taxi stared at her betrayed. 

“Of course they did, you know we would do the same Tiger.” He looked up to give Taxi an adoring smile. “I’m just surprised that it’s not a big shock that we’re dating?” Br’aad’s brow narrowed in smirk. 

“It really isn’t.” Sylnan shrugged and walked back toward the kitchen. “Like Velrisa said,” He poked his head into the fridge and returned with a can of beer, tossing one over to Mountain who nodded in thanks, “It was kinda inevitable.” 

“Well the next piece of new might shock you then,” Br’aad’s hand wormed its way into his own and left a squeeze. Taxi did not like in the slightest the manic glint in his eyes, it usually meant he had a plan. He did his best not to show his rising anxieties 

“What y’all are getting hitched next?” Mountain snorted into his drink. 

“Yup! We’re getting married!” The party fell silent, and Taxi felt his blood go cold.


	4. Beanbag

Taxi kicked Br’aad in the back of the shin, hard. “I’m so sorry I told him not to make that joke on the way here.” He tried to meet the eyes of the party who were still in shock.

“But look! I’ve got a ring and everything!” He pulled an unopened ring pop out of his many pockets, because of course he did, he was Br’aad after all. 

“I regret buying you that now,” Taxi sighed and removed the hand that kneaded his forehead in a desperate attempt to rid of this stress induced headache. “You are a menace.” 

“Your menace.” He tilted his head ever so slightly. His eyes signalled a silent thank you for not ‘yes and-ing’ the situation like he previously suggested. It was easy to catch the meaning behind the glint, Taxi’d spent longer than a while ensuring that the holes Br’aad and him dug, only ran so deep. 

“Yes,” Taxi rolled his eyes. “You’re my menace.” His voice was strained through gritted teeth. Br’aad made eye contact and wildly gestured his eyebrows at the other, urging him to do… Something? Taxi blinked in confusion, Br’aad jerked him forward by the hand and tilted his head, leaving the cheek exposed. “Oh, okay.” Taxi’s eyes widened in understanding. He leant down and pressed a peck to Br’aad’s cheek. 

He felt Br’aad’s cheek curl into a smile, watched as his eyes crinkled into it. It was surreal, he had to remind himself that Br’aad was just a good actor as he stared for the shortest second time allowed. It would have been a sweet moment if Sylnan hadn’t chosen to immediately interrupt it by striding across the room and grabbing his brother by the shoulders. 

“Br’aad you’re going to send me to an early grave.” Sylnan choked out a sigh. 

“I’m really sorry.” He smiled and shrugged, very the opposite of what he claimed. 

“You’re going to give me gray hairs, I swear.” 

“As if you don’t have them already.” 

“I have gray hair?” Sylnan let go of him immediately and started rifling through his hair, trying to check every single one of the strands for discoloration. 

“It’s in the back.” Mountain, clearly amused, shouted out. Sylnan started tousling it in a panic. 

“I can’t see it!” He turned his head to the side as if almost attempting to see the backside of it. 

“That’s because it’s in the back.” Mountain shouted again, holding back peals of laughter. 

“Oh quit torturing him, Mountain.” Velrisa swatted at his arm. 

“Velrisa do I have grey hair?” Sylnan whirled around at the sound of her voice. She brought her water to her face so quickly to avoid answering, a small bit sloshed onto the counter, refusing to make eye contact. 

“Br’aad?” He turned back around, eyes wider than before. 

“We should start movie night!” Br’aad turned away from his brother and clapped his hands together. 

“Br’aad I have gray hair?” Sylnan’s tone was becoming more distressed. 

“Movie night time.” Br’aad pointedly ignored him, a stupid smile on his face. 

“Oh gods, i’m old.” He paled and fell onto the couch with a thump. 

“Yup.” Mountain pointed at a random spot of his head while making eye contact with Sylnan, signaling where the greys were, then took the opposite end of the couch. 

“Mountain stop that.” Velrisa gave him a glare, but he rolled his eyes and begrudgingly listened. “It’s not that bad Sylnan. You can only see them if you’re looking-” 

“I’m going to have to live in a nursing home and worry about hip replacements.” he smoothed the back of his head as if he were attempting to shake away the evidence. 

“You’re not old, you’re like twenty.” Taxi chuckled. 

“I’m going to have to write a will, how the fuck do I even retire?” Sylnan seemingly ignored him. 

“You should have a will even if you aren’t old Sylnan.” Velrisa passed a concerned look. 

“I should?” He cocked his head. 

“I don’t mean to be homophobic.” Br’add interrupted. “But what the fuck is a will?” Velrisa opened her mouth, then quickly shut it, favoring instead to shake her head in disbelief. 

“You two concern me more and more everyday.” Taxi sighed and fell into the closest chair, a plush beanbag that was far past its prime, and knowing the brothers, probably stolen. 

“At least i’m not bald.” Sylnan let his head, resting on the back of the dingy couch, fall to the side toward Mountain. “I’ve got that going for me.” 

“Oh you little bitch.” Mountain lunged across the couch to grab him. Sylnan just barely slipped out of the way with a laugh. 

“Hey Br’aad.” Taxi turned to face his ‘partner’, ignoring the beatdown Sylnan and Mountain were experiencing. “Come on, take a seat so we can get the movie started. There’s a seat over…” he took a pause to survey the room for open seats, and saw Vel taking up the last one. “Well I guess I’ll get up so you can have someplace to sit, i’ll just relax on the floor by the couch.” He moved to get up but Br’aad pushed his shoulder back down. 

“It’s alright, I know where I want to sit.” Taxi’s face turned to confusion before shifting into complete embarrassment, as Br’aad climbed into the bean bag chair with him and fell into his lap. He clocked the flush on Taxi’s face and whispered. “What kind of boyfriend would rather sit across the room from their date?” 

“A pretend one, who also is not going to marry you for the prank, I'm begging you don’t make that joke again or next time we might have to actually be stuck in it.” Taxi’s tone shifted downward into annoyance, careful to keep a smile facing outward, but it was getting harder and harder to maintain it with Br’aad on top of him. 

“Divorce might be the perfect dramatic ending for this- you know what? we’ll talk about it later.” 

“We can talk about it now Br’aad, just promise me you’ll not pull something like that again.” 

“I don’t want to take anything off the table right now… Just think about it.” 

“If you say we’re not _‘really’_ getting married-” 

“We’re not really getting married, we can just get divorced and- oh!” His eyes lit up. “Tax benefits! Right? That’s a thing right?” 

“I don’t care about ‘tax benefits’“ 

“You should. The economy is in shambles” 

“You don’t even know what a will is, you don’t know fuck about the economy.” Taxi raised an eyebrow. 

“Alright so i’m like thirty percent sure that those have nothing to do with each other, but you can’t use your big words to fool me Taxi.” 

“Will is one syllable Br’aad.” 

“And I never had a good school experience to teach me what a syllable is.” He shrugged. 

“Do you- do you need me to tutor you or something? I don’t know how you’re a functioning adult.” Taxi flashed a look of concern. 

Br’aad opened his mouth to retort but lost the chance. 

“Gods you guys are going to make me throw up, quit being sweet and whispering at each other over there and help pick out a movie.” Sylnan’s voice broke the sweet moment for the second time of the evening. 

“Like you and Kathrine aren’t like this all the time.” Br’aad shouted back incredulously. 

“Well the difference is, Kathrine and I are cute.” He said it matter of factly. Br’aad snorted in response. 

“I just think you’re jealous that you can’t make out with your girlfriend on the beanbag right now.” He narrowed his eyes toward his brother. 

“Is that what’s happening?” Taxi squeaked out, and was ignored. 

“You can think whatever, but you’re wrong. I don’t want to have to see my brother make out with a furry in the living room.” Sylnan laughed. 

“I’m not a furry!” Taxi exclaimed, emotional whiplash kicking in from the fluster of Br’aad to the accusation. 

“He’s not a furry!” Br’aad grabbed the front of Taxi’s shirt and pulled him closer. “He’s just…” 

“No he’s basically just a furry.” Mountain nodded solemnly. 

“Mountain!” Taxi gave him a look of betrayal. 

“But he’s not wearing a fursuit, how can it count if he’s just born as a catman?” Velrisa interjected. 

“I’m right here guys.” 

“I think it still counts?” Sylnan paused and brought his hands to his chin thoughtfully. “A furry is just an anthropomorphic animal right? And he is a cat with anthropomorphic qualities, so he’s a furry, whether or not the fursuit is natural or a costume doesn't matter.” Everyone was quiet for a moment as they stared at Sylnan. 

“How do you know this much about furries?” Mountain looked at Sylnan with a degree of suspicion. 

“Look.” Sylnan shivered. “You’re better off not knowing.” The look in his eyes persuaded everyone away from asking anything more. 

“Okay fine! He’s a furry!” Br’aad threw up the hand that wasn’t pulling Taxi close. 

“This is kind of racist.” Taxi muttered. 

“I’m going to make out with him now just to spite you.” 

“Wha- '' Taxi was cut off by Br’aad tugging him forward again and lips crashing into his. 

“Not on the bean bag chair!” Sylnan called out 

“I’m doing it on the beanbag chair!” Br’aad pushed him away again to flash a middle finger and shout. Taxi felt like he was in a daze. 

“Quit being gay and help us pick out a movie you fuckers.” Mountain threw the remote, it landed with a clunk a few feet to their left having missed it’s mark completely. Br’aad adjusted his hand to instead point its middle finger toward Mountain. “Fine we’ll just watch that new movie you hated.” 

“Oh absolutely not!” Br’aad shot up off of Taxi’s lap to argue in length with Mountain, leaving him to be flustered alone on the beanbag chair. 

The number of times he had made out with Br’aad in the last hour far exceeded the amount of times he’d ever wanted to, which was an unchanging zero. Nothing had changed about that specific want, he just felt particularly more flushed than he’d ever really expected. 

Which could just be chalked up to embarrassment really, right? ...right? Taxi’s mind drifted toward the secondary part of their agreement, that whoever fell in love first ‘lost’ whatever that meant. Of course this couldn’t be love in any way, especially now remembering that. 

Taxi watched Br’aad wave his arms wildly from across the room. Taxi was still… uncomfortable with their arrangement, and of course he refused to be the one, if any, to lose, and so he watched Br'aad's face. His eyes narrowed from the argument but a light glinted in them nonetheless, a hint of a smile as he tried not to laugh, and the subtle cock of his head. He watched not in admiration or doting, simply with an air of intrigue. Taxi didn't quite know what to make of him, whether to hate him for his antics or behold him for all the times those antics lead to good. His head empty, the only thing he could bear to think was a simple sound of confused understanding, a "huh." with the period at the end to symbolize that nothing else really could be said. 

He couldn’t exactly tell if the fluster was leaving or getting worse, but the beanbag felt worse sitting in it alone.


	5. Winter Cold

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back babes, come get y'all's juice. I'm writing this under threat of being called a mini cooper to death. Thanks for not-bullying me into writing these 2500-odd words Anarchy :D lol
> 
> have fun reading! <3

“You really don’t have to walk me home you know.” Taxi watched Br’aad roll his eyes in response.

“And what kind of boyfriend would I be if I didn’t Taxi?” His voice took up a dramatic tone. 

“One that was already home, and apparently one who doesn’t own a winter coat, or any coat for that matter.” Br’aad shivered and drew in closer to their linked arms, as if mentioning his lack of a coat made him colder. 

Br’aad had started their trek from the Venegelor apartment by offering an arm to hold on to along the way. Taxi had originally planned to just hold on long enough until they were out of sight, but seeing Br’aad be as cold as he was, even if he refused to admit to it, left him holding on. Besides what kind of fake boyfriend would he be if his partner got a cold because of his negligence? 

“Why would I wear a coat and cover up how great I look?” He spoke through chattering teeth. It was all Taxi could do to not look at him skeptically. 

With a sigh, Taxi untangled their arms and took off his jacket, a simple green tinted thing but the inside was lined with fleece which worked wonders against the chill in the air. He offered it up to Br’aad. 

“Just put it on before you freeze.” Br’aad looked from the coat to Taxi for a moment. 

“That’s actually a really great idea, we can really get some more obnoxious points if i’m wearing your jacket.” He nodded approvingly. 

“Why do you keep saying “obnoxious points” like you're counting them?” Taxi smirked. 

“You mean you aren't tallying up everything? I’m already 10 points ahead, I'm doing all the heavy lifting.” 

“What do you mean you’re 10 points ahead? I don’t even know what you’re counting!” Taxi looked incredulous. 

“Well you’re obviously going to lose our deal then.” Br’aad pulled the last sleeve over his shoulder and shrugged smugly. 

“Wait, hold on, I am not going to fall in love first, you’re going to lose here, stop counting.” Taxi crossed his arms. 

“The points say otherwise Saxi.” He shrugged again. 

“Fine, then the jacket counts as 10, plus another point for every time it’s effective.” 

“What! No!” It was Br’aad’s turn to be incredulous now. “One point per action! And only one point per thing, you cheater.” 

“How am I the cheater in this situation? I’m the one letting you keep your extra 10 points.” 

“Don’t blame me for the deal you agreed to, you decided to deal with me for three months.” 

“And what a long three months this is going to be.” Taxi sighed good naturedly. 

“Yup, you’re getting the full Br’aad experience baby!” He gestured flamboyantly with the words, hands arching in an imaginary rainbow. 

“You mean I've only been getting the half-time Br’aad experience this whole time? I’m hurt.” He chuckles. 

“Well it’ll give us all the obnoxious points we need.” He smiled. 

Taxi offers the crook of his elbow to the other “C’mon we’re almost there.” 

Br’aad snorts and wraps his arm around it in acceptance “So now you’re being a gentleman?” 

“Nope.” He looks down over to Br’aad with a smirk “I just got another point.” 

Br’aad pushes away from Taxi’s arm with a groan, leaving Taxi to laugh at his disgusted face. 

“Nine points behind, i’m still winning Saxi” He rolled his eyes and melted their arms back together 

“Not for long though.” He instinctively drew his arm closer, closing the distance in between them. Heat drew in like a heavy fog surrounding them both and not letting the winter through. 

The street lamps flickered with warm glow, illuminating the ground with a pale yellow. It was a distinguished contrast from the shades of layered blue hues surrounding them, light reflecting only where a sliver of the moon brightened them. For a moment the only sound was calm breaths steaming the air and a set of keys in Taxi’s pocket clattering noisily in the quiet. 

Soon enough they reached the steps to the complex of apartments that Taxi called home. It wasn’t quite that late yet and most of the windows shone a welcoming yellow. Br’aad leaned against the rickety railing of the stairwell leading to the main door. It was made mostly of chipped paint that was at some point a shiny black, and rust. It bent backward just slightly against him. Br’aad scratched awkwardly at his neck, staying at the first step. 

Taxi took a moment to stare. He was not the waiting at the front step kind of man. Typically Br’aad was the one to overstay welcomes and not even realize. 

“Are you alright Br’aad?” His question seemed to shock him out of a momentary haze and he jolted just slightly when addressed. 

“So…” his tone took up the one that proposed plans and requests. Higher in infelection, with a shaken foundation. His confidence never seemed to be behind the words, like he was unsure or embarrassed by them, like he was used to them being easily dismissed. Taxi’s nose twitched as he waited for the thoughts to string into words. 

“This might be a long shot but… I was wondering if I could crash here, for tonight.” He looked up hopefully, windows from surrounding windows caught on his face, brightening only slightly but enough for Taxi to see the plea in his eyes. 

“Br’aad I have work tomorrow.” Taxi passed a weary look. 

“I know, i know, it’s just Sylnan’s at a job and I can’t stand being in the apartment alone, and I-” Taxi wondered why Br’aad pointedly refused to call the apartment “home”. Just “The apartment” nothing more, just detached enough. He let out a sigh, he had a bad habit of letting Br’aad get whatever he wanted. Maybe it was a soft spot, maybe it was just the spine he apparently lacked. 

“Come on in Br’aad.” His eyes lit up and he raced up the stairs in less than a flash. 

“Thank you I-” 

“It’s fine Br’aad, just make sure Sylnan knows where you are.” Br’aad took out his phone with a grateful nod. 

Taxi’s apartment resembled less so an apartment and more so a forest. Collections of leafy house plants lined the walls making it hard to walk without brushing the whole scene. Vined plants ran up walls and bookshelves, wrapping around every vertical surface and elegantly twisting. A family of assorted cacti sat in the windowsill soaking in every bit of light they could. 

The main reason party events were held at the Vengolors was that Taxi’s apartment, though slightly nicer, was near impossible to navigate, for anyone who wasn’t Taxi that is. Opening the door he mindlessly stepped around the pot of spilling over sword ferns, and dodged the small table of Sinningia speciosa. Br’aad was neither as elegant or mindless. He stubbed his toe on the first and nearly knocked over the table, Taxi managed to grab his shoulder before he could completely fall over it. 

“Please be careful.” He strained the words of annoyance. 

“Sorry.” Br’aad smiled apologetically and steadied himself, he patted the pot of Sinningia as if apologizing to them as well. 

“I’ll get some extra blankets and a pillow for the couch.” He lightened slightly watching his small gesture. Much like how he had with Br’aad, he had a soft spot for his myriad of plants, anyone who treated them with a degree of respect got points in his book. 

“You’re getting ready to sleep already?” Taxi turned from the closet he’d opened, Br’aad practically sounded disappointed. 

“It’s been a long day, I figured you’d be just as tired.” He leaned a shoulder against the frame of the closet, it was one of the only surfaces not obstructed by greenery, where he could lean without a worry of crushing small vines. 

“Well…” He turned his gaze upward, a distinct breath in, considering his general state. “Yes but, we need to plan what to do next.” 

“Literally this morning, you were refusing to plan anything.” Taxi narrowed his eyes. 

“That’s because I wanted to test our improv abilities.” He waved away the criticism. 

“To be honest, those seemed pretty effective. So why bother?” He cocked his head. They’d practically made paying attention to the movie a struggle for everyone else with their couple antics. There didn’t seem to be a need to go any farther. 

“Because they’ll eventually get old, besides I have some great ideas.” He smiled mischievously in a way that Taxi hated. 

“Whenever you say that, I feel my anxiety get worse.” He flopped onto his couch suddenly far more tired than before. Br’aad quickly joined him. 

“First and foremost, we need to start taking cute couply photos, we need to post them everywhere and make sure everyone is constantly seeing them, so we can prove how in love we are.” 

“We only started “dating” today, won’t it be suspicious if we immediately start with “I love you’s?” 

“Well we don’t say any “I love you”s until week two. Pictures are just to get really obnoxious.” We gestured wildy with his arms while he talked. Whenever he was particularly excited, Taxi noticed, he tended to get this way. “Besides if we start like that it’ll seem like we’re super turbulent which can add some fuel for the breakup.” 

“I don’t really know if i’m comfortable saying that. Those words mean a lot to me Br’aad.” Taxi felt himself retracting inward slightly, boundaries were… difficult. 

“You’ve told the entire party you love us before though?” His head slanted curiously. 

“And I do, platonically. This is different.” Telling his friends that he loved and cared for them was different from the intimacy that a romantic “I love you” suggested. It would feel like a betrayal of every time he’d meant it in the past if he said it so fakely. Br’aad considered for a moment, a finger poised at his chin in contemplation. 

“We can come up with something around that later.” He seemed to decide. “But, the other thing on our list is we need a good getting together story.” 

“Honestly i’m surprised we haven’t needed to tell one yet. Everyone seemed very unsurprised.” Taxi unfolded from the slouch he had settled into. “I guess they just think that setting us up on blind dates was just the breaking point for our clear and obvious love for eachother?” He spoke with air quotes around love. Br’aad snorted watching them. 

“Yes, but I'm going to hang out with Kathrine later this week. There’s no way she’s not going to interrogate me for every detail.” He seemed to pull into Taxi’s jacket, which he still wore. It was fairly too large for him to fit properly but he definitely looked warm. 

“Your sister-in-law now right?” Taxi reached for his phone. 

Br’aad hummed a laugh “Not yet, but probably soon.” Taxi tried to subtly take a picture of him curled into his jacket. He wanted cute couple photo’s right? “I can’t imagine a world where Syl doesn’t- “ He paused for a moment, picking up on the camera pointed toward him, then threw up a pair of peace signs. Taxi took the picture. “Send me that later so I can post it.” 

His legs were curled closer into the couch, his arms snuggled into his jacket. An arm angled over the arm of the couch now supported his head where golden hair spilled over his shoulders. And there was that feeling again. Not anything ever significant enough to qualify for feelings plurality, but something. 

He cursed the pinpricks of his mind that could become so easily confused. The strings of consciousness so simply puppeteered, with an emphasis on simp. He stomped any evidence, any remaining thought away. They didn’t matter now, any of them pastward that threatened to creep upward didn’t matter either. He wasn’t going to lose. 

“We might as well take some more photos now.” Br’aad scooted closer, fishing his own phone out of his pocket. He held it far above them in an attempt to capture them both in frame. 

“But as I was saying, I think he might soon. He’d have to divorce Ugarth first though.” 

“Since when were they married?” Taxi asked. Br’aad climbed over Taxi, placing a kiss on his cheek, taking another picture. 

“Sometime… last year? Tax purposes.” He stared at the photo for a minute before deleting it and trying again, this time putting a hand on Taxi’s jaw. 

“Tax purposes?” Taxi laughed. 

“Tax purposes.” Br’aad snorted. “Oh those crazy kids, they’ll figure it out.” He pulled Taxi’s face sideways facing and brought him in for a kiss. The camera shutter sounded noisily in the suddenly silent apartment. 

As quick as it started, Br’aad let him go and turned his attention to his phone. Taxi sat up slightly, letting Br’aad’s head fall to rest in his lap. His blonde hair splayed out around him but he didn’t seem to notice. 

“What do you think the caption should be?” Br’aad tilted his head slightly backwards from the rest on Taxi’s leg. “I was thinking something like ‘two halves of a whole’ but i don’t know if thast cringey enough.” 

“What about ‘The peanut butter to my jelly’? And then we can have a sappy conversation in the comments.” 

“Perfect.” Br’aad hummed a sound of approval. “I’ll just send- “. He’d gone suddenly silent. His voice, replaced by the ticking clock-like ringtone emanating from his phone. 

“Everything okay?” Taxi’s brows furrowed, confused. 

“I- I need to take this.” He pushed off the couch and moved all the way across the apartment. 

In all honesty, Taxi didn’t try to eavesdrop. Then again it really wasn’t that hard to. 

“Where am I? I’m… You told me you’d call ahead of time for pickups, I can’t- I... “ A beat of silence. “I’ll- I- I’ll get there as fast as I can, i’m sorry.” Another “No, I understand.” His voice had a degree of ice in it. It was thin, over a frozen over lake of panic. 

He hung up and turned to Taxi. Taxi, who had turned to see what Br’aad was doing, whirled his head back to stare in front of himself. 

“I… I have to go.” He hurriedly put his phone in his pocket, and began to take off Taxi’s jacket. 

“Are you alright Br’aad?” Taxi stood. 

“I’ll live.” He sounded worriedly unsure of that. 

“That’s not what I asked.” 

“Just… take your jacket and I'll talk to you later Taxi, okay?” 

“If you’re going out, keep it.” He moved toward Br’aad, rejecting the arm which held his coat. “You’d get a cold.” 

Br’aad stared at him for a moment. “... Thank you.” He held it closer to himself now. 

“What are you doing?” He put his hands on Br’aad’s shoulders. 

“I can explain later I-” He glanced at the door anxiously. “I just need to go. Now.” He shook out of Taxi’s grab and made for the door. He turned one last time “Sorry.” He shut the door and the apartment went quiet once more.


End file.
